This morning - this brilliant blue morning - I drove by a yard where someone had stacked a cairn of stones. It struck me how lovely they were, centered and trusted, one upon another. I realize that my life as of late has been like a collection of stacked stones - one weighty thing on top of another. What I didn't realize was that I don't have to be the thing under all of those stones. I can be the thing on top. The thing closer to the sky with each of life's lessons piling neatly beneath me.
I tried to needle felt this weekend. I had a long weekend - three days not only off from work, but away from home. I was house sitting at a house with a lovely sun porch - great light, and I spent the whole time watching movies under a blanket. I realize I've become a little standoffish around my art - that the pressures of SELLING it have diminished my joy for CREATING it. I have underpriced my pieces - not nearly adequately paying myself for the time each one takes - and it's left a sour taste in my mouth for the whole experience. It's hard, as an artist (especially one struggling with worth and confidence) to put my work out there and price it at what would accurately reflect my time and effort and ingenuity. There's always a part of me that's critical of pricing too high. I do have to change this because each time I undersell a piece of art, while I'm appreciative of the sale, I feel like I've done myself and my art a disservice. So I'm working on that.
I think between the craft fair and selling wholesale and worrying about prices on Etsy, I've lost the passion for needle felting. I have a book full of ideas, but my heart is a little wary of it all at the moment. I'm going to focus on gearing my intent back into the act of creating, and not the act of selling. I think this is really important for me at this point in my life.